Hullo, Graham here again. If you're reading this then I have a feeling that you probably like video games*, so I'm gonna' tell you exactly how to get into the most glamorous industry this side of the dog-food preparation one...
...The video game industry!
I feel like that last bit was redundant.
Now, I can obviously only speak from experience, but of all the Graham Gorings I interviewed for this piece, a staggering ONE HUNDRED PERCENT of them made it into the video game industry by following these three simple steps - so I see no reason it won't work for you, too.
1) Play lots of video games instead of doing homework.
Oh sure, doing homework will give you an essential grounding in a wide variety of skills meaning that on the off-chance that the whole video game thing doesn't work out that you've plenty to fall back on...
...but doing homework just shows you aren't serious about getting into the industry! And you are serious, aren't you? I am. I couldn't be any more serious if I was that dude from Harry Potter who can turn into a dog.
2) Choose the wrong course at university, flunk out after a year and then work in a soul-crushing dead-end job answering phone calls for a further four years.
Yeah, okay, bit of an unconventional approach but you can't argue with the results. I mean, who’s the guy with the blog on the LEGO website here? Is it me or you? That's right, it's me. Unless you're Jonathan Smith, Nick Ricks or Jimmy McLoughlin - but I'm pretty sure you guys flunked out of uni, too, right?
And yes, that will take five years instead of the three years a reputable university course would, but that means you'll have less student loans. And - if you choose the right will-sapping job - you can goof off and play video games on the sly during work hours.
3) Go back in time to 1999, strike up a friendship with the owner of a video game company and then parlay that into a job interview.
Right, I'll admit that one does require a leeeeetle bit more effort than most - but do you want this job or not? Well? WELL?! DO YOU?!
THEN BUILD YOURSELF A TIME MACHINE, MR***!
And there you go! Congratulations! You're in the industry!
Kiss your spare time goodbye.
* I know! It's like I can read your mind**.
** And on that subject, don't buy that house you're thinking about - it's haunted by space-pirates.
*** Or Mrs. Or Ms, Miss or Dr. Although if you're doctor, what are you doing trying get into the games industry? Go and heal someone - your parents will be very disappointed if you squander your medical training.